Part 2: What do you want?

Pre-P.S. If you missed , I’m sharing a series this week helping you answer the question of “What now?” by sharing how I answered that question for myself when I needed to decide what type of offer I wanted to design next.

If you’re in the process of determining what’s next for you right now, I’ve intentionally designed this series for you to be able to follow along and use some of the same questions I did to help you uncover what feels alive for you both personally and/or in your business professionally.


“So what now?” I have learned, is a very big question that has brought me much angst trying to answer. So the first thing I had to do to answer that question was to avoid answering that question at all costs.

Trying to answer, “What now?” led me to focus almost entirely on the “how” of things and distracted me from locating my desire.

As it turns out, locating desire is something that many of my clients struggle with too.

So the first thing I did was ask myself a different question, “What do I want?” And because that was also difficult, largely thanks to Good Girl conditioning, which I’ve been working to shed for years, I had to start with what I knew I didn’t want.

After all, Albert Einstein said, “If I had an hour to solve a problem and my life depended on the solution, I would spend the first 55 minutes determining the proper question to ask, for once I know the proper question, I could solve the problem in less than five minutes.”

There’s value in exploring questions before solutions.

Here are a few things from my “What I don’t want” list…

  • I don’t want to create something that fosters more co-dependency. I see a lot of programs out there that create a culture where co-dependency thrives. This doesn’t lead to long-term results, and it often leads to cult-like leadership.
  • I don’t want high-pressure launches where a substantial portion of my income depends on a two-week launch period. That model works well for some; it’s not my favorite personally.
  • I don’t want to give you another vault of information that leads to overconsumption without integration. I’ve encountered so many people who are oversaturated sponges of knowledge. I don’t want to create something that adds to overwhelm.
  • I don’t want to lock people into being ready and in transformation mode for 9+ months.

I’ve talked about this before, but I’ll mention it again. My shortcut for getting from what I don’t want to what I actually do want is another question. “What do I want instead?”

The magical transition lies in, “What do I want instead?”

Here are a few things from my list of what do I want instead…

  • Instead of high-pressure launches, I want the option for ongoing signs ups.
    • I philosophically believe that we’re only ready to do certain types of transformational work when we’re ready. Having windows of time that force people to decide to be ready doesn’t help long-term results. I have some fears around this approach because I know sometimes we do require a push to make the initial leap. I trust this belief though, so I’m willing to experiment.
  • Instead of a required long-term contract, I want people to come and go (within reason) if that’s what they desire.
  • Instead of fostering co-dependency, I want something that encourages interdependence and honors each person’s agency.
  • Instead of a course feel and a vault of information, I want something that is an invitation in praxis—a process of reflection, action, and then reflection.

So what do I want?

After going through this process, I arrived at my answer and located my desire. Here’s what I had written down…

My desire is to offer an intimate membership with a high-degree of personal touch and coaching from me. ✨ I checked in with myself and felt instantly alive.

This desire is verified by the fact that I’ve been taking notes on how I would create a membership for 3 years but it hadn’t felt like the right time to birth it until now.

Once I could answer what I wanted at a high-level, I then had to explore, “Who on earth is this for?” That’s the email that will land in your inbox tomorrow.

With so much love,

xx, Alyssa

P.S. If you’re also trying to determine “what now?”, I made a guidebook you can use alongside these emails this week. If you’re asking that question personally here’s the guide for you.

If you’re asking that question about an offer or what’s next in a business, here’s the guide for you.

Or check out both and see which one speaks to you.

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Alyssa Kulesa

Alyssa Kulesa

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